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50 Reeeeaally Bad Pick-Up Lines
- Is that a Tic-Tac in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
- What's a nice body like you doing with a face like this?
- Maybe it's all the beer talkin', but I would LOVE to throw up at your place
tonight.
- Weren't you on America's Most Wanted last night?
- Excuse me, you're sitting on my SSI check.
- Is it that cold out or are you just
smuggling tic-tac's
- Wanna see the scar from when I got shanked in the pen?
- Hey Big Boy - wanna play father figure to my three unruly teens?
- Could I interest you in a copy of Watchtower ?
- My mom says I'm the best kisser in the neighborhood.
- Hi, the voices in my head told me to
come over and talk to you.
- Mind if I breastfeed?
- Pretty cool funeral, huh?
- You look like the kind of girl that doesn't make men pay for sex.
- Good news, the test results are negative!
- Excuse me... do you speak Klingon?
- Well, I lost the bet.
- If you scream I'll kill you!
- You look familiar - haven't I stalked you before?
- Hi. I'm a Mormon.
- Aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?
- You know, my infection has cleared up.
- I'll make out with that hot girl sitting next to you if that will make you
happy.
- Would you like to take a free personality test?
- Let's go to my place and do the
things I'll tell everyone we did anyway.
- I got spurs that jingle jangle jingle!
- Has anyone ever mistaken you for a man?
- Could you help me potty?
- Is that wedding ring real?
- I'm in the Libertarian party.
- Bleah. You ever hear of "deodorant"?
- I'd like to staple raw bacon all over your body.
- Yup, your search is finally over.
- Let's have dinner on my Garfield plates.
- We could spoon at my place...my mom's out for the night.
- You, me and a tub full of flan...
- I'm wearing a condom right now.
- I haven't had sex since the Carter administration.
- Wanna see my gun collection?
- Your trailer or mine?
- You look like you need to be moistened.
- I want you to have my children. In
fact, you can have them right now, they're out in the car.
- I've got real bad cramps.
- Who's your Pimp?
- My purse is made from human skin.
- Do you have any cortisone at your house...?
- Going to your place may violate my probation.
- My 'roids are flaring up again.
- Is that... mayo on your chin?
- I need to marry someone tonight so I can stay in the country.

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