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The
Fun of Cyber Flirting
So
you think you are an experienced flirter? Well, I thought I
was too, until I decided to put my flirting experience into
action online.
There
I was home alone yet again and surfing around the personals
sites, when I came across a link to SexyAds.
I
quickly discovered that cyber flirting is a totally different
ball game (so to speak!) than flirting in person.
Gone
were the eye contact and body language that I would generally
employ to attract the opposite sex. Gone was the need for my
favorite alluring fragrance, my well-poised walk and my
confident smile.
All
I had to work with now was my big vocabulary, my vivid
imagination and my Logitech keyboard!
I
have to admit that at first I found being without my usual
flirting armory a little disconcerting. Nevertheless, I took a
deep breath and soldiered on.
The
first step, of course, was deciding on a catchy user name,
something the guys would not only remember but would also find
fun and intriguing. Incidentally, the anonymity factor at
SexyAds was something that really helped put my mind at ease.
I
wasn’t about to go in for a name like HornyBabe or Luv2Blow,
but I didn’t want to come across as some sort of prude
either. Eventually, I settled for TryB4UBuy because I figured
it suggested I was just looking for a bit of casual fun and to
see where things might head from there.
Next
I completed my profile. I found being honest about my personal
details was the only way to go, as I suspected I would be
quickly caught out if I told any ‘little white lies’. I
also made sure I was clear about the options I selected in
terms of what kind of relationship I was looking for. I
didn’t want anyone getting the wrong impression.
Now
it was time to place my ad. I had read on a lot of sites where
placing the right type of ad can really help in narrowing down
the kind of responses you get. So I started by making a list
of points about myself.
I
didn’t see any real need to go into too much detail about my
physical attributes. I intended to upload a photo of myself
later, and anyway, I wanted to attract the kind of guy who’s
more interested in what’s inside my head than what’s
inside my bra. Instead I focussed on the things I enjoyed
doing in life and what I wanted out of a relationship.
But,
as the old saying goes, it takes two to tango. So I thought it
might be wise to include something in there about the sort of
person I wanted to meet. Some people will specify that
they’d rather a non-smoker and so on, but this wasn’t such
an issue for me. I simply put in my ad that I preferred guys
who are spontaneous, have a good sense of humor, and didn’t
view just having sex with a woman as some kind of holy grail.
If all they want is a conquest, they can go climb Everest!
Once
I’d done all this, I checked what I’d written for spelling
and punctuation because I certainly didn’t want to come
across as some ditzy bimbo, then I hit the submit button.
By
now I was really warming to the idea of this cyber flirting
thing.
The
only thing left to do in establishing my profile was to
consider uploading a photo of myself.
As
a female flirter, I thought long and hard (snicker) about
this. I know there are many women at SexyAds who are reluctant
to do so because they wish to remain anonymous, at least to
begin with.
But this
doesn't mean you shouldn’t include a photo at all. There are
many ways you can convey to other members an idea of what you
look like and what your interests are - without actually
identifying yourself in full.
Consider
taking a fun shot with your face turned away from the camera.
If you're into snow skiiing, include a happy snap of yourself
in full ski gear on the slopes. If
you're an avid reader, hold up your favorite book or magazine
to cover just your mouth and nose. And these are just a few
examples. I'm sure you can think of an imaginative idea that
suits you!
As for me, I was happy to include an unobscured shot of myself
because I realised that it might make all the difference in
attracting just the right guy. The
bottom line is that a guy can think your ad is the smartest or
sexiest thing he's ever read, but he's still going to want to
know what you look like.
Of
course, this is an area in which many people can be
self-conscious and offer the old "I'm just not very
photogenic" excuse. To those of you I would say just
this: Relax! I suspect there are very few people at SexyAds
who are expecting to meet a supermodel or a movie star.
Besides, we all have different tastes and are attracted to
different looks and body shapes.
In
any event, your photo needn't be only about what you look
like.
As
I've mentioned, it's a great opportunity to show the sorts of
things you like to do in your spare time or what you're
interests are. I'm a cat lover, so I had a friend take a shot
of me cuddling Snowflake, my six-year-old Chinchilla (note
that I resisted the urge to put a joke about pussies in here).
Your interests might be completely different. You might
be something of a wine expert. Why not take a shot of yourself
enjoying a glass of red? Perhaps you're an artist of sorts.
How about a shot of you holding up a piece of your work?
It's
really is quite simple to make your photo fun and interesting.
It's all about showing yourself when you're at your happiest.
Because, in the end, that's what makes you most attractive to
others.
Now
that I had my profile, ad and photo all in place, I went into
the chat section, where I met a bunch of really great people.
It helps if you’re quite open-minded and have a good sense
of humor in the chat rooms, but it’s an excellent way to get
to know the folks on the site and find out more about
potential friends and lovers.
To
cut a long story short, I have had a ball since I signed on to
SexyAds, not to mention a few very interesting dates. I
haven’t yet found Mr Right, but at least I feel like I’m
heading in the right direction.
TryB4UBuy is a free member
at SexyAds
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