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 “Fake
Personal Ads”
(Stop posting them!)
by
Brandon Tanner
This edition of our column should be written in
RED!
Loren and I did some serious surfing of adult personals to get
an idea of how people were constructing ads.
We discovered many provocative profiles with enticing photos.
The authors were in search of great, heavy sex. Some suggested
anything you could imagine sexually and, for the most part, the
females were asking for it all. They showed pictures of their
spread legs with a focus on the clit and asked for immediate
contact. Several of the male ads displayed distasteful photos of
their cocks as if that would guarantee a response.
We answered fifty ads in each group and discovered eighty
percent of the females wanted cyber and phone sex, but had never
indicated so in their ads. Therefore the profiles were phony.
Sixty percent of the men placed their ads as a joke.
By joke we mean these guys answered our responses with
the E-mail address of a friend who had never placed an ad
anywhere.
Some joke.
We received quite a few irate responses demanding to know how we
got their E-mail addresses. Loren handled the men, I dealt with
the fake female ads. Let me tell you, some forty percent of the
women had placed fake ads using a girlfriend’s E-mail
address. Those replies went from irritation to anger to absolute
ballistic.
There was never any intention of actually getting together for
any in-person encounter. These are the fake ads we’re
addressing here. They’re a piss-off, a total waste of time and
serve little or no purpose. Maybe if a guy wants to jerk off to
a close up of a female crotch the picture has some merit – I
doubt it, but that’s just my opinion. Loren, where are you with
all of this; maybe I’m out of the loop and confused.
LOREN: “You’re not out of the loop – in fact you’re right on.
The men & women who post “fake” ads are just that – “FAKES.”
They don’t really want an actual encounter, they couldn’t handle
it. Take a guess at why that might be.”
TANNER: I’m not sure … they’re shy?
LOREN: “Yeah, shy works, but it’s much more than that.
They “LIE!” Yes, the FAKE ads are posted by liars. They’re
gutless men & women who live in total fantasy. They want to play
with themselves and fantasize. Not one of them could actually go
for real; they don’t have the stuff it takes and they can’t be
honest in their profile or ad.”
TANNER: There’s another side to this issue. Let’s call it the
less than honest reply.
LOREN: “You’ve hit a very sensitive nerve here – we’ve been
involved with that scene several times. Couples and singles are
guilty alike.”
TANNER: The less than honest reply to a real ad is
an insult to the person who placed an up-front profile. We have
first-hand experience with dishonest couples answering our
swinger’s ads.
LOREN: “Tell me about it … the experiences tick me off royal!
We’d get exciting replies to our various ads from interested
couples who lied through their teeth!”
TANNER: We covered some of this subject in an earlier article,
but it’s worth another mention.
LOREN: “I can’t tell you how aggravating it is to get a response
that sounds great only to find out the couple lied about their
appearance, experience, age and sent pictures that were over
ten-years old!
TANNER: No argument here. It comes right back to our opening
comments; be honest in your personal ads and profiles – tell
the truth! Don’t post dishonest or fake ads.
LOREN: “Enough said.”
TANNER: Well, maybe not, but we’ll let it go at that. Take care.
Tanner & Loren
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