Top
Five Things that Turn a Man Off!
by
WiseWoman
The top 5 things
that turn most men off are:
- Bad
Hygiene
is
offensive but for those men out there
who are experienced devotees of giving
“the ultimate sensual pleasure” to a
woman, I commend you and profusely thank you
from the bottom of my heart <snicker>.
Personal hygiene is extremely important and
although I imagine MOST women are very aware
of this factor, it seems that many of the
men who wrote to me had this as their number
one turn off. I have a tip here for any man
or woman who knows a woman with a chronic
vaginal odor problem, this is a tried and
true WONDER cure for said problem. Cranberry
Juice!!! Most women know about it,
especially those who lived in a dorm in
college. Cranberry juice is one of the best
cures for many “female” proclivities and
you should drink 8 ounces or more of it per
day. And before you are going to have sex,
naturally, wash well so you don’t have to
worry about turning your man off!!! (Common
sense to me).
- Communication
I was amazed by the amount of
men who wrote about this because
historically, it is the women who usually
complain about the lack of communication
from the men. However, I am acutely aware of
the difference between the two different
languages we use to TRY to communicate but
again, that is a whole other article. So I
will list the main objectives the men had
and there are some VERY valid points that
they made. These are big turn-offs for men:
A woman who talks only about herself thereby
not showing any interest in him, women who
talk about other men; ex-husbands, current
“other” lovers and the like; women who
talk about non-sexual things during the
sexual act, like their kids, what they did
that day or the WORST boo boo, calling him
another man’s name; women who have little
or nothing of interest to talk about (this
being a common complaint coming from dozens
of highly intellectual men and yes, to my
delight, there are many on SexyAds
<smile>); women who have lied about
their sexual prowess i.e. who claim
beforehand that they love giving head but
when they do it, they are BAD at it, i.e.
doing it for only a few minutes, doing it
out of obligation or doing it when you
clearly DON’T like doing it.
MEN want us to tell
them what we want, explicitly and in detail
(this is a BIG turn-on for them) so if they
ask what you want and you don’t tell them
they (mistakenly) think you are not really
interested. Most men are so intent on making
sure they please the woman that they think
the ONLY sure way to do it is to find out
exactly what she likes (forgetting that they
might already have the skills and just the
sheer sexiness to just wing it and go for
it). They might be less self-confident and
start asking questions like “do you want
me to eat your pussy?” which, any woman
knows, can be VERY unromantic and break the
magic. I think I could probably write an
entire article on this one
factor…….women are more into the
“romance of the seduction” when a man
takes his time to explore her whole body and
find out what makes her squirm, while men
want to know up front, a list of things they
have to do to secure her that almighty
ORGASM. A woman for sure wants the orgasm
eventually, BUT the “discovering” of her
body, the intrigue of what he will do next,
is what keeps HER hot so this is indeed a
delicate catch 22.
As a woman, I want to slowly reveal
my skills, ever so sneakily surprise my
lover with tantalizing techniques so he
won’t know what to expect next. This is
what I mean by spontaneous seduction. I
think women feel that if they have to tell a
man how to make love to her, it spoils the
intrigue for her. So although it is NOT a
turn off for men when a woman doesn’t tell
him what she wants, in my experience, the
times I have been explicit with a man and
told him in detail how to do what I need him
to do, not only have I been blissfully
satisfied, but the man has thanked me
profusely over and over saying that he will
NEVER forget his experience because he felt
so incredibly successful, studly and like he
was the BEST lover on the face of the Earth.
So ladies, it’s your call. And gentlemen,
please be sensitive to the magic of the
moment as a woman is sighing and moaning,
don’t break the spell you are casting upon
her to ask her a question. Use your intuition. Take the time to learn a woman’s body
and you will be rewarded in ways you never
thought possible. Being a sensitive lover is a learned virtue. If you can
discuss your desires beforehand, the success
of the lovemaking can be more spontaneous
and satisfying once you finally get to the
act.
One more thing that
the men asked me to mention here as far as
communicating was it seems that a good deal
of men spend a lot of sincere time, effort
and energy on SexyAds, not to mention the
money they spend to get the opportunity to
offer themselves to you ladies, and they say
that few women bother to respond. I can’t
tell you how many have told me that I am the
ONLY one who has written back to them. I
feel that if anyone has taken the time to
inquire about my availability or interest
possibilities, I can at least have the
decency to respond one way or another. If I
get a rude or crude email, I still respond
with a smile, thanking him for giving me the
opportunity to maintain a high level of
honor for myself and for him (without
feeling it necessary to lower myself to his
base level of self-disgust) and wish him
well. Not only do I appeal to you ladies to
respond to every email you receive, I simply
can’t take them all on by myself
<wicked grin> and since you are on
SexyAds to meet MEN, I challenge you to take
some of the gentlemen for yourselves.
(Stepping down off soapbox now).
- Spitters
Men
absolutely positively DETEST spitters. I am
always amazed when men tell me there are women
out there who actually spit out their semen. I
can’t think of anything more off-putting than
that (of course he’s already cum so his sexual
energy is already spent and he just wants to get
on with life or go to sleep <giggle>) but
apparently it’s true. If you expect him to
devour you and all your juices, don’t you
think it’s fitting to reciprocate? That is a
prerequisite to passing “Sexual Goddess
101.” <smirk>.
- “Money
grubbing materialistic women”
A
direct quote from a man who responded and many
others had the same sentiment. I have thought
long and hard about this, wondering if I myself
have ever come off leaving a man to wonder if I
was indeed a money grubbing materialistic woman
(MGMW). I have a different bent on this
(<chuckle> go figure). Because of my
upbringing, the criteria by which I choose a man
with whom I desire spending my time warrants
many things that may point to the ILLUSION that
I am a MGMW. However, I am not. I simply require
from my man as a MINIMUM requirement, that which
I bring to the table. That is, I don’t ask for
anything more than that which I also offer. So
that being said, if I require someone who is
fiscally sound, well educated, cultured etc, I
am simply trying to match my OWN offerings,
thereby narrowing the “mismatch” spectrum
and expanding the chances of more
commonalities.
On
the other hand, those women who are of meager
means who can barely support themselves and
their offspring, seeking someone to raise their
station in life, might well be considered MGMW
and I feel sorry for the men who are duped by
this type of woman unless they find true love
after all. I am told there are a lot of them out
there and I imagine in this day and age, a lot
of men (not as chivalrous as their predecessors
i.e. the knight in shining armor types) might
take offense to this approach. I think we all
have dreams and aspirations, and truly just want
someone to share them with. Some are successful
in attaining them easily, while others flail
desperately trying to gain some semblance of
normalcy so they can know how it feels to give
and receive love. Perhaps it is the men who
DON’T have the resources a woman wants who are
most offended by these women who they call MGMW.
It is shallow I agree, to go around seeking
another who’s value lies in what that person
can give to you rather than seeking someone with
whom you to become harmonious as a team, but
sometimes when you get down to the nitty gritty
of WHY a person wants what he/she wants, there
is usually a pretty sound reason behind it. But
rarely is that question asked in sincerity,
rather an assumption is made and unfortunately,
an opportunity might be lost. A misjudgment
made.
- Unresponsive
women
Men
continually strive to find ways to please their
women. They know that this is the way they can
get what they want which is SEX. When the men
are giving and the woman isn’t responding, the
man feels rejected. I have heard a million times
women say, “If I just give in, he will finally
leave me alone.” Then they lie there, count,
talk about other things, fake an orgasm, and
basically just go through the motions. Women who
are turned on, hot, desirous and sexy are
naturally what a man wants to make love to. I
can’t help thinking that the men who have
women who are unresponsive, might be boring to
her. Having been married twice myself, knowing
how dull the same thing is over and over again;
I can understand both sexes getting bored with
their long-term mates. If you have read all of
my articles, you know that I am an advocate for
“variety.’ I know for myself, if there is no
excitement, no passion, no seduction, I find
watching grass grow more stimulating. So, if
your woman is unresponsive, try asking her if
she is bored, and then get proactive about your
lovemaking. Get toys, invite other men, offer
different types of turn-ons, maybe go to a swing
party or two so that you can find a way to get
the juices flowing again. It’s worth doing the
effort if you plan on staying with your woman
for the duration!!!
Personal
note: I GREATLY appreciate all of you who have
so diligently taken the time and energy to write
such wonderful encouraging emails. Keep up the
GREAT lovin’!!! <smile>.
If
you're a SexyAds member you can email wisewoman@sexyads.com
©2002
Tami Fox. All rights reserved
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